A Gay Ex-Muslim in Singapore

Let me share with you one of my favourite songs. Why it's my favourite? Because it is simultaneously both soothing and tense. As one YouTube comment puts it: "NieR's style of making OSTs - Make a song with soothing and memorable vocals. - Now keep the soothing vocals but add feelings of Risk, Urgency, and Tension to the instruments. - you have successfully told the player to "fight or lose everything"" It was a very apt song for someone who was trying to reconcile his religion and sexuality back in his secondary school / polytechnic days. Cognitive dissonance was real and intense. At the same time, composure and repression was paramount because the thoughts that I had couldn't be freely shared. It was easy to relate to the song. For a large part of my life, it was my identity - to be calm despite the warring factions inside my head. Another song by the same game with a similar theme is 'Kainé Escape'.  The game was released in 2010, not that I...

"Are you here to support or are you one?" "Are you Malay or Chinese?" "Can I have your number (or Instagram, or anything)?" It was three questions asked near the end of Pink Dot 2015. My first Pink Dot, and the first time someone hit on me in real life. I was more panicked than excited in the heat of moment, really. I went for the event with a few of my close polytechnic friends. With the word 'family' in mind, the girls I went with could've passed as sisters or mothers with how I often relied on their opinions with my experiences. The issue was that these people were missing in the exact moment I needed them most.  We were heading to the MRT or someplace nearby to look for food, before the guy caught my attention (probably grabbed my arm). The first question came out, to which I answered I was both 'one' and a 'supporter'. I wondered what kind of solicitation it was, when he asked the second question, and that clued me to the g...